Monday, 12 May 2008

Sadness and Joy

Been a mixture of these over the past few days.I find the rollercoaster of emotions, that life can be sometimes, very difficult. I am a rut person really, change does not suit me.I have also been in quite a reflective mood which is never good for me.
Our eldest cat ,Eric,died on Saturday.It wasn't completely unexpected as we had noticed his decline over recent weeks.We think he could have had a stroke.Came back from shopping and noticed that he was not right and within a few hours he had gone.I love my cats but I am not overly sentimental about them.It has just made me think a lot about loss.Big things and small things.Sometimes I find the small things affect me more than the big.
I am missing my Mum and my granddaughter.
I miss my youth.
I miss having energy
Sunday we went to the resheduled BSB meeting at Brands Hatch.Glorious weather in fact to hot for me.Great racing.Good fun.


Anonymous said...

It's strange the way one thing can set us off, and how quickly our thoughts snowball and we become sad.
I do this alot. It'll start off happy, thinking about Shadow, then I'll worry about him being poorly (his leg at the moment), then I generally get thinking about my mum, who died 3 years ago.
And it always upsets me SO much I end up crying.
I miss lots of things too.
I guess I need to start being happy for what I do have. I tend to take everything for granted and pine for what I'm missing.
I hope you start feeling better soon, and I'm glad you had a good time at the racing :)

Lazy Giraffe said...

Lots of hugs :(

niftyknits said...

Sorry for your loss Debs :-(

We lost our cat a few weeks ago and I still think I hear him coming into the bedroom most mornings.

Kezzaroo said...

I used to be a creature of habit but now I'm all for change as much change as can possibly be thrown at me in a short space of time please. Theres some kind of trigger in everyone that sets them off and the cogs turn and you're thinking... constantly thinking. I miss my best mate immensely, think about him almost every day for the last 5 years, and i cant think about anything happening to my mum without getting into a state. Giving you a virtual hug, you know, just till i can get a real one :D xxx

cloudhopping said...

big hugs to you debs.

I still dream about my 1st cat who I lost 4 years ago.

Saysie said...

Big (((hugs))) Debs!
What a lovely and happy life he would of had living with you.
Its amazing what an effect our pets have on us. I used to be terrified of dogs until we got our's. Sadly he is not part of the family anymore (long story) 6 years on I still think of him and still shed a tear.